FiyaStarter.com - Educated Lady of Soul

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“I was gonna drive around
the corner and get a blow job.”
-Charles Barkley
Drunk ass political hopeful.

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--graduated Howard in 2000 as a double-major in Sociology and Music History
--graduated NYU in 2003 with masters in English
--was offered a staff writer position with every major entertainment publication to be their music reviewer for R&B and rap. She turned down; Ent. Weekly as "wanna-be hipsters who 3 months late on everything people," Spin as "buzz-hungry geeks who think they're on the frontline in the never-ending War of Cool, but they don't have any ammo," Rollingstone as "a fucking relic that has never come close to its potential," The Source as "every issue since 1995, an exercise in obsolescence pub," XXL "an office filled with the "Inferiority complex folk, because of their obsession with The Source," and finally Vibe "a magazine run by space cadets, saditty sistas, sluts and slags who know nothing about hip-hop other than who'd they'd fuck, who they wouldn't fuck and what Jay-Z tells them." So why would she join the staff of a start-up who can only pay her $300 a month? "Because I can write what I want to write and not feel any pressure to sweeten any of my reviews."
Nope, don't sweeten anything Erykah. We want you to be your brutally honest bitter self.

FiyaStarter RATING =

Fiyaballs

Album Review

Fiona Apple - Extraordinary Machine
A More Polished Apple
by: Erykah Lauryn Scott, for Entertainment

I am alive.

I felt the need to announce it, as I haven't reviewed anything since John Legend's Get Lifted, and the hate mail I received because of that review led to rumors that I had been killed. So, again, I am alive and well, despite countless threats and confrontations. Indeed, my hiatus was self-imposed. Ripping mediocre artists was not something for which I wanted to become known. I simply refused submit another album review until I actually liked something. Obviously, the wait was quite extensive.

Enter Fiona Apple.

Apple's third album, Extraordinary Machine confirms a suspicion I've held of her for a long time. She's brilliant. Lyrically, she remains peerless, but her improved vocals and song writing have put her on track to becoming a once in a generation type artist. At just 28, Apple has explored emotional depths that her contemporaries have willingly and actively avoided, out of respect for ticket and CD sales. Anyone can warble a 3.5 minute ditty about lost love, but very few are willing to address their role in losing it. Apple never retreats from such challenges.

(Not About Love)

This is not about love
'Cause I am not in love
In fact I can?t stop falling out
I miss that stupid ache

It is satisfying to watch an artist entering their creative peak. With help from Mike Elizondo, frequent collaborator with Eminem and Dr. Dre, Apple has proven that Jon Brion was not her puppeteer. He may have helped her develop clarity in creativity, but her talent is hers alone. Elizondo's production gives Apple's patented witticisms and jabs at ex-lovers an added menace that she lacked with Brion.

(Get Him Back)

The next one up
A contemptible snob
He lived to put things in their place
He did a commendable job
He put himself so low
He can hardly even look me in the face

I hate to draw catty comparisons with other female artists, but it's good to have Apple back in the game to serve as an artistic gap-filler between the whimsical goth of Tori Amos, the sunshiny pop of Sheryl Crow, the ethereal melancholy of Sarah McLachlan, and the well-worn novelty of Alicia Keys. I just hope it doesn't take her another some years to put out an album. I don't think I could take it.