Movie Review
Get Rich or Die Tryin'
Worse than Belly and State Property Combined.
by: Reggie Eggert, for Entertainment
The
movie was bad. We all knew it was gonna be bad. We all know 50
can't act, no matter how many times they put Joy Bryant's pretty
little ass on TV, telling everybody "he did a great job"
and "he's so talented." Joy, shut your lying
little pretty ass up! You damn liar! You too pretty to be lying
so damn much! Goodness!
But none of that even matters, because I enjoyed seeing this movie
anyway.
"How can that be, Reggie?"
Because I saw it in a crowded theater full of ignorant ass black
folks. Yup! nothing makes a bad movie good or a good movie bad
like the ongoing commentary of niggas. So, without further ado,
here are the top ten comments made at the District of Columbia's
own Union Station's 5:10 showing of Get Rich or Die Tryin',
last Thursday:
10:
"These old ass women doing all this screaming and 50 wouldn't
even fart on they old ugly asses."
9:
"Nah, Nah...I think that nigga from 'The Five Heartbeats'
gonna be his father."
8:
"Take it all off 50! That's right! I wanna see the whole
thing. So seductive."
7:
"Damn that nigga teeth big as shit, young! Them joints
look like some dry wall up on a screen."
6:
"You better keep your muthafuckin hands off my soda. You
shoulda bought one. I told you to buy one."
5:
"He think he so fine. I been hated his ass since "The
Best Man."
4:
"Shhhh, ya damn self...don't shhhhsh me. Shit. I'm grown."
3:
"Nigga, you a Jehova's Witness. You ain't no gangsta."
(*Note:
that's actually in the movie)
2:
"She ain't got no ass, but I'd still fuck."
1:
"This joint would been tight if they woulda
made Ja Rule his enemy, young."
