FiyaStarter.com - Reel Hot with Reggie Eggert

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“I was gonna drive around
the corner and get a blow job.”
-Charles Barkley
Drunk ass political hopeful.

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Reggie Eggert (30)

-Loves any movie with black people in it.
--Reggie was fired from BET.com for giving a 4-star review to Woo, which is quite possibly the worst movie ever made. Yes, worse than that. Yup, that too. It’s unforgivably bad. Reggie has learned his lesson. He promised not to give any movie with Jada Pinkett Smith in it for more than 20 minutes a rating higher than 2 and ½, because that’s all they deserve.

FiyaStarter RATING =

Fiyaballs

Movie Review

The Honeymooners
Black People Star In Bad Movie Based On Old White TV Show
by: Reggie Eggert, for Entertainment

This movie isn't anyone's fault. It's not Cedric's fault for taking a golden opportunity to cement his name on Hollywood's A-list. It's not Gabrielle Union's fault for collecting a check. She's a black actress. Big studio checks don't come easily for her. Obviously, the same can be said for Regina Hall. And I damn sure can understand why Mike Epps took the part. He's a black comedian with absolutely no acting abilty. That's tougher than being a black actress.

What this movie is is a bad idea. That's all. Sometimes, studio excecutives get to thinking and they just come up with fucked up ideas without running it by anyone else, and movies like The Honeymooners Starring Black People just happen. Think Double Dragon... Street Fighter... Battlefield Earth... The Island of Dr. Moreau... Orgazmo... Baseketball... The Never Ending Story III... Godfather III and so on. It happens all the time and you can't blame the stars or the directors. They're just collecting a check. You can't even blame the execs, because it's their job to have bad ideas.

However, this takes it to the limit. I truly felt sorry for everyone involved. It's going to be hard for Ced to ever get another leading role in a summer comedy. And Mike Epps better not ever say anything about Dave Chappelle again (google it) after standing around and looking goofy for 90 minutes in this fucking turd. At least Dave would have ad-libbed a few zingers. This nigga stuck to that fucked up script, all happy to have a job and shit. I doubt if this will have any affect on Union's ascesion in Tinsletown. She's just too pretty and talented for this to derail her. That girl's smile could light up New York City for weeks and weeks. Her face would probably start hurting, but she could do it. Besides, she's a very good actress. Hall is an even better actress than Union, but she has a ways to go.

If you're expecting me to talk about the movie, you can stop reading. The movie is an eyesore. There's nothing redeeming about it. Nothing was funny. Nothing was charming. Nothing was cute. It's a waste of time. Just a bad idea. The only thing to be worried about with this horrible movie is whose career will take the worst hit. In my opinion, it's Mike Epps. This nigga was terrible. I swear he was talking just like Lightning from The Amos 'n Andy Show, except he wasn't as remotely as funny. And now I hear this guy got the title role in a movie based on Richard Pryor's life? And he even received Pryor's blessing? Man, I'd rather see Bruce Bruce play Richard Pryor before Mike Epps! I'd rather see Sheryl Underwood play Richard Pryor than Mike Epps!

Don't go see this movie. If you do, it's your fault.