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The Wire, Season Finale Review
by: James Flame, for Entertainment
1) McNulty through this whole episode was like a walking country song, minus the harmonica. From the opening flashback of the episode where he practically creamed on himself talking about the gratification of catching Stringer to the disappointment of him not seeing Stringer before he got killed (yes, ladies, he’s really dead) to let him know he finally caught him, through him getting a half-ass moral victory by way of Avon seeing Stringer’s name on the snitch sheet, down to that goofy ass Gomer Pyle smile he wore during his new gig on Hill Street Blues. It looked like a fabric softener commercial, except that smile was the only thing being sold here. I’ve come to the conclusion that these writers hate cops almost as much as they hate drug dealers. I mean, they make them so miserable and stupid… and miserable.

2) Kima... WoW

3) Marlo won. Get over it, folks. You can front like it hasn’t, but it HAS been there in front of us the whole season. People just thought that Avon would eventually pull a Rocky and prevail in the final hour (literally) like the good guy always does, despite getting dominated for the last eight episodes. Well, first of all, he's not a good guy. He’s a drug dealing killer. Secondly, he lost, convincingly. That courtroom scene provoked the biggest collective "Damn, that’s fucked up," sigh of season. Again, get over it. This is what happens to 97% of the people who live by street law. They either die, go to jail, or go to jail and die

4) Avon was tired. He almost needs some rest up in the bing to reevaluate himself. After he got the call from Slim Charles about Marlo’s location, he made the most half hearted ready for war-move to the “Safehouse” I’ve seen in hustling history. He was finally getting what Stringer was trying to accomplish, albeit he did it totally wrong. His adrenaline rush after getting out of jail was just blinding him. Barksdale didn’t adjust to the game. He looked older than his last name sounds. He was still stuck in two years ago and it flat out cost him. He was the epitome of an old hustler this whole season; a dinosaur dealing dimes on a corner in Baltimore.

5) I mean, she was really putting in overtime on that titty. I forgot this was television for a second. I was waiting for Cherry Lee to make a cameo.

6) Carcetti had that court room set ablaze. He snaked the shit out of his boy. Too bad it took him two minutes of MLK’esque ranting to figure out what everyone else could see coming. "Sounds like you’re running for something." Well, no shit. You should have been seen that, dummy. He’s a friggin’ politician named Carcetti.

7) Umm, I dunno, maybe it’s me but that free drug zone shit fucked my head up all season. I think the world would blow up if this really happened. The President would pull out a big saw and cut Maryland right off the map to make up for this colossal blunder. And if the concept wasn’t already unbelievable, how about the weak outcry after people found out? Legalizing the drug trade in a neighborhood? When we have people who protest for the rights of confessed killers and sea monkeys, I’d say finding out about a police set-up crack block is taking-it-to-the-streets worthy. But hey, that’s just me. By the way, what the hell happened to that lady who wouldn’t give her house up? Would you visit your grandmoms there?

8) What a difference two months make. The way youngin chumped Cutty with the utmost confidence and the way he looked like Super Mario shrinking back into a plumber was just magnificent television for every old head on the planet. Cutty has been my favorite character the whole season. He’s got that ‘tegrity. The way his eyes wander still make me feel uneasy, but that’s alright. He’s for the kids and that’s what matters most. R.I.P. Russell (Jones not Bell).

9) Young black girls, take note: This is what happens when you bun up with not one but two hustlers. They get shot dead, by friends, Muslims and gay people. Think she'll go for three? Hmm, where's Boddie? Oh yeah, standing at the crossroads of his corner career. "Which way do I go, which way do I go?"

10) Young black girls, take note: That’s how you suck a titty...well, it is.

WRAP UP
Finally to tie things up here, I read something a couple of months ago about how the writers wanted to draw correlations between the war in Iraq and the upcoming season. They did a nice job from the Two Towers being blown up right off the bat, temporarily halting the drug trade to only later be sanctioned by the government of all places *gasp*. I could have done without McNulty Pyle finding the Wealth of Nations book at Stringers house. A bit overkill. But the Slim Charles line (of the season, might I add) "If it’s a lie, then we fight on that lie,” was about as good as it gets on TV (*see #’s 2,5 & 10). Hopefully HBO will come to its senses and bring The Wire back next year. I heard there’s a chance they may can it. It’s not the fault of this wonderful cast and their writers that a) it’s compared to The Sopranos, which has a fixed cult following based on Mafia Life, and b) they run head to head with Sunday Night Football and The Desperate & Horny White Lady Diaries. For this show to end so abrupt based on those factors would leave me and many of its other fans most unsatisfied… You know, like the opposite of Kima’s new friend?


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